Epic Chicken Pot Pie

What's better on a cold winter's day than a chicken pot pie with delicious filling and crisp, yummy crusts on the top and bottom? A chicken pot pie with delicious filling and crisp, yummy crusts on the top and bottom, with one in the MIDDLE.

Pie Filling:
1 lb carrots
1 celery heart
2 onions
Worchestershire sauce
Granulated garlic
1 1/2 lbs green beans
10-14 chicken thighs and legs
4-5 medium/large potatoes
Bay leaves
Red pepper flakes
Whole allspice
Salt
Pepper

Cordless Screwdrivers:
4 oz vodka
1 orange
Sugar

Pie Crust x 3:
1 1/2 cups flour
1/3 cup shortening
Ice water

1. Slice up the onions and marinate them overnight in Worchestershire, salt, and granulated garlic. Honestly, a sandwich Ziploc bag works fine, but if that offends your sensibilities--feel free to use a bowl or something.

2. Cook chicken in water. This will take 4 hours or so. Put the chicken pieces in a large pot along with 3 bay leaves, 1 pinch of red pepper, 5 whole allspice, 2T of salt, and 1 t of cracked black pepper. Bring pot to a simmer and maintain. Add water as needed to keep the liquid level high in the pot. When the chicken is nearly done (starting to fall off the bone and very tender) drink 4 cordless screwdrivers with your cooking partner (see note below) and add the orange peels into the broth. When done, you should have about 12 cups of broth.

*Note: Cordless Screwdrivers. Slice an orange into wedges by first cutting in half from stem to navel. With a large orange, you can get 4 nice wedges out of each half. Cut any white fibers off the inner point of the wedges for ease of eating later. Dredge the orange wedges in sugar. Pour a shot of vodka. Do the shot and eat the sugar-coated orange wedge as a chaser--thanks to Every Day Drinkers.com for the inspiration!

3. At some point while the chicken is cooking (or even the day before), prepare the vegetables. You'll need to peel and cut the carrots into coins; clean and chop the celery (or mince if you'd rather); wash and dice the potatoes; trim the ends off the green beans and slice em in half.

4. Saute the onion in a large pot with fat skimmed off the chicken broth.

5. Put the tubers and celery to the pot and add broth until the veggies are covered. Boil until the tubers are done--aka you can poke em with a fork and it goes in nicely without too much resistance. Add the green beans and cook until they're toothy.

6. Put a strainer over another large pot and drain the chicken into it. Put the chicken back into the original pot and put the lid on it. If it's cold and wintery outside (as it should be if you're making the recipe PROPERLY), put the pot with the chicken outside to cool off. If not--well I guess you'll just have to wait then!

7. Drain the veggies into the pot with the broth and put them aside.

8. Make the three crusts. Combine the flour and shortening in a large bowl. Rub the mixture between your hands until it is fully incorporated. Add ice water by the spoonful, mixing in between, until the dough comes together into a ball. It shouldn't be too moist, but it also shouldn't be crumbling apart. Roll out the dough ball on a floured surface until it is big and round enough to fit into the bottom of a cast iron pot (mine is about 12" in diameter, with 4" high walls). Make another batch of dough and put the rolled out circle into the cast iron pot's lid. Dock these two crusts and bake them in a 450-degree oven until they're browned--about 12 minutes. Make the third crust and roll it out into a circle about the diameter of your pot. Set it aside and put plastic wrap over it to keep it moist.

9. Make the gravy. Take the chicken and veg broth that you've made and bring it to a simmer. Add a mixture of corn starch and water until the broth has thickened into a nice gravy. My advice is to start with just a bit of the corn starch mixture at a time--you don't want to end up with Jello! Set aside.

10. Hopefully the chicken will have cooled off a good amount by now. Pick the meat off the bones. Dispose of the bay leaves and whole allspice. Combine the chicken with the veg.

11. Assemble the pie. Put a layer of the chicken and veg mixture in the bottom of the pot. Spoon some gravy over the layer. Add the baked crust you prepared in the lid of the cast iron pot. Add more chicken filling and gravy on top of the middle crust. When the pot is filled up, place the unbaked crust over the top of the pot. Cut slits in a radiating pattern (looks like a sand dollar, kinda). Bake the pie until browned and warmed through--about 20 minutes in a 450-degree oven.

Serve!